I didn’t think they were going to eat my babies.

Don’t even need the hot dog.

Howcan it be? I just took my mandatory annual ethics training refresher. My certificate says I am ethical now.

I’m rapidly losing faith that it’s worth trying to be better.

We are most definitely not making 1.5C.

Universe: whoops let me fix that.

Like the horror of this code is wrong but the program works.

What did you do with your old yard?

Thank you very much for the clarification. I didn’t know that was a distinct feature.

My flabbers are gasted.

Can’t be held responsible for what happens next given the circumstances.

Do not try to slap the ass — that’s impossible. Instead, only try to realize the truth: there is no ass.

Ripples begin to emanate from the closest ass cheek but vanish as soon as you look away.

It’s like beholding the face of God. You immediately crash to desktop upon attempting to render even a single frame containing that much ass.

I like that one of my first thoughts was I wonder if they’ve correctly implemented special relativity. Let’s find out!

Microsoft: Our computer.

Interesting study. However, I think we’re past the point of studies informing our decisions here in the US. I still thought it was really interesting to read.

Life is short. Be happy now, in any small way that you can.

You’re now a program manager.

That definitely sounds like a feature that should be added. I remember when you couldn’t even export your subscriptions.

The point is your money goes into billionaire’s pocket.