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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: June 13th, 2023

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  • I’m delighted when people text back and we have a conversation, though I don’t find it frustrating when that doesn’t happen.

    This is mainly because I keep track of important conversations in some external system, messages I’m waiting for, etc.

    You never want to be sitting there waiting for a response, the only reason that’s annoying for you is because you have that tug on your mind and you’re not able to do other things until that tug has resolved itself. Keeping track of it externally means that you’re not having to keep track of it internally. That’s what you’re really frustrated at, that pull at your attention that means you’re not able to focus on other things.







  • Markimus@lemmy.worldtoTechnology@lemmy.world*Permanently Deleted*
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    11 months ago

    I went on omegle not too long ago actually and the thing I remember was that the text version of the website was inundated with bots.

    You had to skip through maybe 10-15 bots before you would find that one real person, and even then it was hit or miss whether they would actually want to stay and have a conversation.

    Another thing: the constant “asl” as the top of every conversation; it’s like people were trying to use it as a hook-up / dating / sexting app rather than it’s actual purpose of connecting with people from around the world. I think that mission got lost somewhere.





  • Markimus@lemmy.worldtoADHD@lemmy.worldADHD + Depression is weird
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    1 year ago

    I’ve been down your road and I know it can be scary. Things seem out-of-place, there’s no inherent meaning. I’m sitting at my desk trying to decipher the meaning of life. I get a few notes in where I come to this resolution:

    • There is no meaning.
    • Life’s meaning is what you make of it.
    • Every discovery of meaning simply sparks the search for greater meaning.
    • There can be no satisfying final meaning for everything.

    .

    This is something I stick with for a while, that you have to invent your own meaning. I would look out for goals, values, something that I could tie the sail of life to that would keep it from blowing about all over the place. I was looking for an anchor. I felt that there was an inherent need to tie it down with something, anything. Perhaps we can do this for short periods of time, though as we all learn: every time that anchor is uprooted, which it inevitably is, the façade comes crashing down, the sail blows everywhere again, and you inevitably spin out of control until another anchor is found.

    It wasn’t until much later, sitting at my desk, that I found the solution. It was almost on accident really. I am sitting there reading this book called The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer, and I am reading this chapter on death. There is something the way it expanded on the idea of life, how death is the one to grant life to you, how life itself is a gift. Without the consciousness, there truly is nothing. The fact of experience is something which is the gift, and we often hide from that gift by shielding ourselves. Life itself serves as its own meaning.

    The moment I found this I felt more at peace. There was never any need to tie life down with an anchor, life itself was coming in through my senses and that was meaning in its own right. The sail blowing all over the place is meaning. The anchor served as an attempt at protection, though I would no longer be participating in this protection. If I continued to tie life down in this way, I would not be able to experience that which is life. I now want to experience more of life. I let the flow of life pass through me, without creating blocks, or doing anything to disrupt this flow. Life just pours in through my senses. This serves me well, and I expect it would serve you well too.



  • That’s great! Thank you for the appreciation. I’ve had my fair share of procrastination so I know what it’s like. 😅

    Hey, so crazy idea, if you’re looking for a life coach / mentor I would be happy to give that a try; it’s something I’ve been meaning to break into. I imagine it would be weekly check-ins and dealing with some of the different problems you’re facing, though we can adapt to what you need. Send over a PM if interested.



  • Thank you, I’m glad this little breakdown helped. It’s actually been something I struggled with recently, so putting it here in plain English was useful for me.

    You are not your achievements—you never have been.

    You are separate to your achievements.

    If you really want to know who you are, there are some books that help on this subject, though you are the conscious observer of these things, not the things themselves. If you construct a shelf and I put this shelf in front of you and ask, “is this you?”, of course, you would go “no, that’s not me.” If you achieve earning yourself a mansion and fine clothes, you may think those things are rather nice, though those things aren’t you and the thoughts that those things are nice are also not you.

    What happens is that you actually get lost in the energy of your achievements; anything that upsets that delicate balance tips you over the edge into that ultimate pit of confusion / despair, like your whole world has been turned inside-out—you are unable to risk anything that might damage that sense of self and tip you into that state, therefore you don’t ever take any risks. It’s the ultimate casualty of building any sense of self-concept that you protect other than your true sense of self, the conscious being observing those things.

    I’m looking forward to Sandman89 season X+1. :)



  • Procrastination is a deep subject, and the reason for procrastinating is going to be different for every person.

    To me, it sounds like this is not the procrastination of one thing, though rather the procrastination of a lot of different things, so I would suggest that the issue you’re probably struggling with is perfectionism.

    Perfectionism stems from you seeing mistakes as deep, personal flaws, defining yourself based on achievement as well as how well you do something, and doing things in order to earn approval and acceptance from others, rather than doing things for yourself.

    Perfectionism is other-focused. Healthy striving is self-focused and self-driven.