You’re advocating for respectability politics. We have to be nice to the people who hate us to try to convince them to be nice to us. If that’s the game you want to play, you can. But it certainly hasn’t achieved victory for anyone yet. You know what has achieved change? Protesting. Being loud. Telling people when they’re wrong. Not putting up with the bullshit.
You’re advocating for assimilation, while what we want is liberation.
Polyamory can solve this problem.