When you’re lonely, you don’t become cripplingly hopeless and withdraw from life? You just contact some friends or easily make new friends and have a good time and carry on with life?
When you’re driving your car and everything is fine until you come to a stoplight, you don’t suddenly become depressed at the stoplight like I do?
When you wake up every morning, you don’t have crippling existential dread? You just get up and go about your day cheerfully, without analyzing the futile meaninglessness of the big picture?
I had the third one for some time: the answer was medication, doctors and psychologists. These will obviously help with all of your points.
The meaningless of it all is still there, as a possibility, but there is also a fascination to it. You think. You feel. You love. You hate. You find things beautiful, or ugly. The universe is there and you are experiencing it. Even if it’s meaningless… Think about NOW. Isn’t it f*cking fascinating?
That makes me wanna enjoy the ride for as long as I can.
You can enjoy the ride too, and I have no doubts about it. Zero. In fact, I have negative doubts. I have REASONS.
Oh my gosh, that sounds amazing. Please tell me what medication is doing this for you?
Every medication doctors have ever put me on just makes me numb and orgasmless. And all of the bad side effects without any of the benefits.
What is your medication?
Don’t use my medication just because it worked for me. Go to professionals and follow their criteria.
In fact, my dose is basically the smallest one you can get for an antidepressant.
Also, medication is not there to make you feel happier. It is there to give you a little push on getting back on track. But there is still work to do.
Food, sleep, sport, relationships… These are so much more critical than any medication. Bookmark some Andrew Huberman podcasts and get to work. You can do it.
Not who you asked, but I have similar experiences with recurring depression throughout my entire life so far, and I get a big boost in capacity to avoid deep depression for months/years just by using a small amount of psychedelic mushrooms every now and then. Not even enough to lose my grip on reality or anything wild like that, just enough to chill and be contemplative for an evening. Literally sustains me for months/years from one session.
I’m looking forward to the scientific community doing more studies on the effects of mushrooms, I truly think they are a potentially massive benefit for some neurotypes.
Yeah for years I keep hearing people talk about microdosing, of course it’s illegal In most states and illegal for anyone to tell me where they get this stuff, no one ever tells me. 🤷🏻♀️
But I’ve heard that big pharma is slowly coming around to legalizing this and making it available through prescriptions, So somewhere in the back of my head I think I’ve kinda been waiting for that to happen.
Rumors say there are some platforms selling grow-kits including everything needed to get started. In Europe, people recommend some platform starting with Zam and ending with nesia, which supposedly provide a variety of kits.
You can also find plenty of resources online to start from scratch. The easiest seems to be the uncle bens method.
I’ve read that it’s relatively easy and cheap to grow them yourself from spores you can order online, but I haven’t looked into it yet. Hopefully someone else can chime in with some info.
Uncle Ben has done more for mushroom growing than anyone else I can think of